Monday, June 05, 2006

Sandstone County - Episode Thirteen

Sandstone County Sheriffs Department - To Serve, To Protect, To Get Rid of All Dirtbag Criminals by 2026

Deputy Hidrent waited outside a popular local bar, hoping for a bust. At closing time as everyone came out, he spotted his potential quarry. The deputy was elated because his upcoming victim was none other than Dirk Baggs. From the first day of his legal career Officer Hidrent swore he was going to "take down that worthless dirtbag." Looks like this will be the day.

Dirk was so obviously inebriated that he could barely walk. He stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, looking for his car. After trying his keys on five others, he finally found his own vehicle. He sat in the car a good ten minutes as the other patrons left. He turned his lights on, then off, wipers on then off. He started to pull forward into the grass, then stopped. Finally, when he was the last car, he pulled out onto the road and started to drive away.

Hidrent was waiting for this moment, with small quantities of spittle seeping from the corner of his mouth. Somewhat trembling, he turned on his siren, hit the lights and pulled the man over. He administered the Breathalyzer test, and to his great surprise the scum Baggs blew a 0.00! Hidrent was dumbfounded! "This equipment must be broken!" exclaimed Hidrent.

"I doubt it," said Baggs, "Tonight I'm the Designated Decoy!"

Yet another low-life, deadbeat Sandstone criminal, showing absolutely NO respect for the law!

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